going on six weeks, haven't bathed i feel alive every time i run the water... ...the steam... it gets in my eyes and melancholy memories flood of last time i cried ion wanna think i'll continue wasting my time grape gatorade jolty is how they find me complaining about this place hardly h8 it just saw a dime piece u kno that i've been in binding my hands are hurting, they're binded tryna find people like me is why i can't keep up writing but realistically aren't we subjected to the same shit? hyped up when u write me then humbled again when lanes switch text me every thirty minutes talkin how u h8 ur dayshift ion kno, nothing's changing u might as well get ur days switched talk this bullshit like i'm loudly tryna say something in meaning but honestly just meaning to put out something when grieving sadness as my soil ur toxic, u'll kill my breathing carbon dioxide goth girl strangling all my feelings quarter gram of E! make sure to cut that bitch in fourths from the moment saw ur teeth knew that shit couldn't get much worse rain pouring, i still speed i'm looking 2 crash of course feels like forever i been me turtle coated in a blur i'm so toxic obnoxious from the moment that u walked in this mosh pit seen u glaring i'll be honest... ,..,.i want ya but if history repeats i'ma wish i never fuckin saw ya

every aching minute i stay taunted by these feelings know that i'ma get it u can see it in my dealings bitches dirt, i am gravel w gold getting hurt; i have traveled this road hey! i got a couple baddies that ain't mine in my messages! yae got me feeling pretty fine, ion mess w it today get a couple zeros. ion pay my rent w it u a lame. u a fake. get the fuck up off my precipice no u r not a resident ur not around here don't start guessing shit is it fate? is it fear? leviticus i cannot say. i fear remembrance ion got no fuckin time for ur negligence get ur shit and go i ain't no friend o his vroom vroom i'm the postman of decadence u ain't even seen shit, u got no evidence

i wish that u would be more malleable bitch i guess i'm waiting for a miracle i say bitch with all respect, i know ur not one but ur act is fuckin terrible. i'm carrying all this care for u i try so hard, let down my god damn guard for u... it's true, u make it so damn hard what more can i give u but my all? it's hopeless.... u won't even pick up the call so i take another substance can't help that i love this nothin that i'm floating in like nothin's goin on yeah i'm gone no regrets weighed this dose up for myself overdose it just for help i don't need it. i'm aware but it's so fuckin lovely here but it's so fuckin lonely here i wish you'd meet me on this side take a ride, 20 minutes, u'll be fine i swear to god i wouldn't lie about this shit i know my mind and i'm just healing what's inside i took my demons strangled and wringed em i killed what's killing me inside i thought u were a keeper i'm tryna keep u but equally just weighing both sides life's short. u should make it what it's worth worthless overgrown and took my soul and it hurts i might take death to dinner and treat her just justly ask her why pipes and needles made me ugly

thinking about disappointing u aches me shared my beliefs she's like "bitch r u crazy?" obsessive impulsive nah i wouldn't d8 me pushin loud pax ain't a job it's amazing i do not blame u i foresaw this moment the day that i h8ed u was the day that we started home is where the heart is how r u so heartless u ripped out my heart like i ripped off ur garments so damn incomplete and ur pieces place easy lean back in my seat roll it up need my greens, please pull up w dat awp pop pop bodies drop ay 4700 on a thot ain't a thang, babe na fr ain't a thang give a freebie makin new friends the colors turn 2 grey and fade as the mood ends don worry not a little every star needs a moon and wouldn't that be gr8 but ur proving 2 b useless yea ur proving 2 b useless looks like i need a new bitch lil crayola blaxkened for new shit pushin mfs like Boombl4

there's something wrong w me can't put words together my social skills iffy i'll never get better when i open up i mess up and i stutter simple conversations aren't something i offer half of me's hatred. the other half's hiding i don't know my purpose. it feels like i'm dying i like loud music but not too loud. i'll panic every substance i done one week l8r's a habit lil shordie wanna rock my world told her back off i been living my life to the fullest, fk it mask off located on the bayside, pushin on that crack rok chain 2 icy but the snow doesn't last long check in on the time and it's six past half-gone crayola candy colored bitches think that i'm a bad goth tell me y the feeling of black is what i latch on guess that they don't see this ember pit throwing tantrums my brain bleeds vibratin forming n2 sad somgs saturation make a mf come off mad soft find me in September carvin pumpkins into phantoms woke up, got the bag, load the pookie for a blast off I used to get ready for the day Now they just pass by Hammer on the table Hadn't even used it last time Six substance cocktail. ionno what u expected Turns out something like that's killin my best friends

Why do I care so much about a stranger? I adore you Seems like every conversation's getting stranger like i'm born to Slave for my princess, her jester to more mood Glory to God if the gods give me more you I had a dream and you were there and everything felt natural And I swear to God you kissed me and I wasn't even sad at all I can be murder, you're vegetables and we're casserole Two or three hits we can chill and try to cram it all Something's saying you're the one and we can be prime numbers It's only been a week but I think i really fucking love her Suited in my gilli and my bayo like a hunter Track that femi scent, accshy witness all her wonders She called me pretty and i liked that, i shaved that week Gets me gitty and she likes that. brain, save that peace If I win her over I will save that piece Once I win her over, won't delay what that means If anything you make me actually wanna write this Focused far too long on why i ain't writin Lost a couple cuzzies, or cussies. Didn't cry and That fucked me up more than the matter at hand Fuck drug culture, called my dad on some Xans He reminded me what it felt like to talk to my dad And told me what it meant to really act like a man Said I didn't think I could, but he thinks I can After I got off the phone, I think i took a tab or more And everything made sense as i laid on my appatment floor My nothing was now everything, I couldn't couldn't quit grabbing for The plate, well I saw twenty. It turned into twenty million more Went from reckless to that and abandoned My ego was all structured from my talents Abandoned myself and Karma just got its revenge Started hating myself once I forgot where my peace is

i'd like to tell u it's alright i do anyway even though i lie i know we're anything but old but time can feel forever when direction's never grown i should change myself i asked for this but didn't how'm i supposed to know what my mind was never given i got nothing and i'm fine with that but who can tell the world that i would rather be a deadbeat to the day i'm found killed i don't know where i was going withdrawals got my memory my mind all spinning i don't know what to tell u but the truth hurts and i'm giving u the truth i smoke too much yeah i'm looking like a chimney blunts bust down as i flex ur girl that disney+ it's not much but it's making her act frisky + i don't even want her i just want her company "vak that little cap had me so damn geeked up" i know that's the plan i double dosed it for a reason got the mg scale i know exactly what ur seeing Mara Talos virgin Mary meets the scenery insecurity's a bitch and shawty don't wanna fight fair to maturely progress i can't keep living in fear egolossnes i see my faults but i don't have the strength to change my ways ur so flawless i should get my faults fixed i been this way forever it's just hittin me now egolossness don't let me fall too quick oh gods whoever u r, hold me egolossness i see my faults i'm so fucking awful let me breathe egolossness i see my faults but i don't have the strength to change my ways egolossness ur so harmonious you're so flawless take me away

i tend to be an a-hole i get a little manic while i'm falling down the k-hole i didn't know my world could bend like a rainbow bullet in my raincoat. two packs now my life's a day slow it's 4am again and my e-cigarette just died, there's few things good in life the minutes feel like days, it's fucking torture being up here. i wanna grab a knife, forget and slice my coke plug advertised a gat. told him i want that, and not for the reason that he thought this is all my fault. i asked for this fever dreams are now my constant way of life and i love it new cussies always scaring me. i'm buggin i think what i got's way too strong and i dug it never coming down but the bender ain't rugged late night walks to the Rally's window hug me see i got cash, the peddlers talkin funny i got that tunechi. spice, dey don know i snort that luxury sweet crystal like candy cuz i'm funky the way that she blows me off's like a talent she's so damn good at it, i can't fucking stand it but she's far too lovely for me to forget try to act like i don't care. three weeks still no text used to get told i should quit prepping speech and instead just listen, but look where they got me mind finished canvas of all white paint strokes empty vessel of a brain's way more pain than i paid for

i roll all over in bed, i can't sleep think there's demons and jesters in my bedsheets was it the way that i asked you know you never gave me anything to work with made me worthless you know i'm hurtin how do explain to you that this is urgent you got your money now you don't need me around so soul sucking never sucked me off right maybe i'm soul sucking maybe you tried your best to love me idk bih i shaved 4 u kno i always loved ur hairs always hated 2 but i do it cuz i care A i'm gay 4 u i'll admit it tho i tremble when i do yoo hoo can i get opinions going in this room not you all i got is sad joints sad lines maybe i'm pullin out at a bad time i can't forget what we had how can you